Fame, or something similar

For just a moment, we were almost famous at Film Bin. The crossover commentary we did with Tysto for 'Flash Gordon' crept into the top 200 podcasts on iTunes, and for a few fleeting moments there was a sense of accomplishment before I realised that it meant nothing! Oh, yes, we were receiving congratulatory rice pudding from our imaginary sponsors, but the glory faded (as did the pudding) and now we're back to normal. We remain unspoilt, as far as we know. Go ahead, iTunes, do your worst!

Every fifty posts or so - this is number three hundred and fifty - I remind myself that this blog is not for anyone's benefit really except for perhaps my own. It's a personal challenge rather than an exercise in quality control or publicity, but it is so easy to lose track of that fact. Over on Film Bin it's worse as there are more of us and it's far worse to have no feedback on a podcast than it is on a blog. We just keep on going, and try to do what's fun and interesting, and sometimes it feels really good, while other times it is extraordinarily hard. It would be nice to know if we're doing anything really bad that could be improved upon. We put it all out there for some reason, but it's not for fame or popularity so much as... hope? This needs some thought. No, I remember now that the reason for Film Bin is that I or we wanted there to be a commentary series that everyone could listen to without fear of swearing or rudeness, where we could talk about practically everything as long as we did it nicely. In short, it's a demonstration of naiveté being made real and sticking around. Again, take that podcasting world!

Away from mostly pointless introspection, the theme of this week is writing and calculation. For weeks now exploding code has been thwarting my intent to get to grips with last year's postdoctoral work, and it is still driving me mad! There has to be a way to get this to work! There must be! Research is a job where you confront your own ineffectuality on a daily if not hourly basis, and it's frustrating as anything you can imagine. Hence biscuit addicts roam the corridors of Mathematics departments seeking the light, and every success is a diamond in the rough glimmering in a bed of coal. Apart from that I've been cranking out e-mails to friends long neglected and mid-way through the week it's becoming more than a little difficult to keep writing the same things over and over, remembering who already knows what and why. At least Ireland will provide a bit more material. Ah, Ireland...

Yes, holidays loom next week, like icebergs in the mist. Ireland, the green island, home of the maddening Loon, will take it's turn in trying to break me down into having fun. Will it succeed? We'll all find out in the aftermath. There might be fun, there might be inevitable rain, or ruined castles. There will probably be potatoes and wandering in the mist looking for things to do. Oh good grief, holidays strike again! Help!

Finally, for the interest of cyclists in the Kidwelly to Pembrey area of Carmarthenshire. Please check an up to date map before committing to national cycle route 4. It doesn't lie where you think it lies, is mostly an overgrown dirt track, and it is very very annoying. I release another sigh into the wind and close.

O.