Published

It should feel better to be published, finally. It should feel different. Why does it feel like nothing at all? It's actually very similar to the grand anti-climax of finishing both degrees and the HND, if a doctorate can ever be said to finish. I think those moments after that last undergraduate exam will haunt me forever: that walk to outside the Sports Cage, that realisation that it was all over with no hullaballoo of any kind, and that aimless stroll back to pack up the stuff for moving out. Such is the matter that life is made of, and none of it is the coffee creme.

Surely, there must be some satisfaction in finishing something sometime?! Am I just utterly inured to all joy, thanks to the constant strings of disasters that come sliding down the hillside of experience? Such cynicism does tend to ruin enjoyment of things, even when you are successfully juggling two students, a proofreading job and a couple of research projects. Perhaps 'successfully' is too strong a word. Some of those things are on 'dead stop' at this time! Who can really juggle so many things! It's wonderful that there are friends and correspondents to stop me going crazy...

Oh, that's one assumption made. Madness, madness!

It's odd, then, given this pervasive sense of anti-climax, that anything ever gets done at all. How on Earth are things ever enjoyed? There must be a clerical error somewhere because watching 'Legal Eagles' recently was lovely, and the final seasons of 'The Mentalist' and 'Parks and Recreation' are fascinating and enjoyable for their sheer audacity in deviating from their respective formulae. Oh, 'Legal Eagles', one day you'll get a post of your own. One day! 'One Hit Wonderland' by Tony Hawks is still great, and Darwin's 'Voyage of the Beagle' is fascinating.

Perhaps this has all be an accident waiting for happen? Perhaps the final result of this post is an anti-climax? Yes, sometimes life does resemble meaningless words scrawled on a page.

O.