Story: 'Diary of a Laundry Robot', Week IX

( Week VIII , Week X )

Saturday

The problem with being a laundry robot that has been adopted and liberated by the pan-dimensional beings of the Querg Dimension, and asked to take care of their hats, as strange things occur all around you, is that sometimes you get just a little confused. This is one of those times, as Celia (my colleague) and I get to go on a tour to see the Ring of Querg, and someplace called Nardoli's. We set off some time ago, in the jeep that the Quergs kindly provided, and our companion Egbert, a temporarily displaced elephant, has been telling us stories full of egg puns. Now, in a lull, while Celia drives and Egbert dozes, there is finally time to record this diary. After these weeks of Blots, moving to new dimensions, strange elephants and local customs it seems rather boring to write about commonplace events.

I wonder what the Ring of Querg actually is, anyway?

Sunday

Celia has been staring at the Ring for ages. I still find it hard to believe myself. Up above us, in the pinkish blue sky of the Continuum, there hangs a gigantic ring where the Moon would be on Earth, but in some kind of synchronous orbit. Egbert has been confused ever since he saw it there. "It's extraordinary! Marvelous! Inexplicable!" The Querg in the Visitor Centre has been trying to explain, but the eccentric elephant is not inclined to take explanations.

The only blot on the occasion is an actual Blot. It's rather worrying, for a laundry robot to be followed by a 'blot'. The Querg has already reported it in, and we'll start a lengthy and roundabout trip back home to the laundry tomorrow. Celia thinks that it's connected to Egbert. Who can really know?

Monday

A grand journey awaits. Celia, the more agile of us, was planning it yesterday evening with the Querg from the visitor centre. I'm still bemused that the extradimensional guardians of the timelines of the multiverse have visitor centres, but they explain that it's necessary for the numerous people who pop in from neighbouring dimensions and the other Quergs who don't get to see the Ring very often. Apparently, we will see the Plain of the Solitary Boulder, the Gardens of the Guardians, and the Ancestral Hat Factory. A hat factory! How wonderful! As a laundry robot, I've only ever washed things and never seen them made!

Celia is getting rather a smitten look in her sensors when she looks at me. I've not seen her like this since the great sock clearances of ten years ago.

Tuesday

Got married. Apparently Egbert is a registered priest of the Temple of the Great Egg. It sounds made up to me. I was overwhelmed by the splendour of the hat factory.

Thursday

We have returned to the laundry, which is now surrounded by Blots in the most worrying of numbers! Supervisor Querg is deeply concerned, but did give us congratulations on the unexpected events. He says that the mystery of Egbert has been solved, and that we will all be briefed over the weekend. For now, we get back to work. A large number of hats have piled up unexpectedly. Some are even singed! Could any of this be connected to the Blots?

To be continued...